If you’re anything like me, you apologize way too frequently, and usually when you haven’t done anything wrong.
We apologize for things we can’t control, like bad weather during a party we’re throwing.
When a waiter gives us food that isn’t cooked to our specifications, for example, we sometimes apologize because someone else was at fault.
And sometimes we create excuses for life decisions we have every right to make, such as changing jobs or ending a relationship.
We’re hardwired to crave a sense of belonging, and we don’t want to be outcasts from our tribe, so many of us resort to extreme repentance to stay in good graces.
We might also apologize because we’re sensitive to other people’s sentiments and want to make sure we haven’t hurt them unintentionally.
It can feel vital to express contrition for potential slights and crimes, especially if you have been mistreated in the past because this can reduce the danger of revenge.
We are, however, diminishing ourselves and promoting a sense of guilt and subservience by doing so.
It’s admirable to apologize when we’ve done something truly wrong, or even if we fear we’ve wounded someone else unwittingly. But there are some decisions we must take responsibility for and never apologize for.
Often, we apologize because we worry too much about what other people think, or because we put their feelings above our own needs. There are many situations where an apology is unnecessary.
Here are 15 things you should never apologize for, even if you think you should.
1. You Should Never Apologize for Loving Someone
Enjoy the fact that you have the ability to love. Many people around the world are too afraid to fall in love in the first place.
It makes no difference who you love or if they love you back. What matters is that you are able to love.
2. You Should Never Apologize for Saying No
Respecting your own limitations is a sign of self-respect. If you cannot give 100 percent to something you should never apologize for saying no. The ability to say no is a sign of a good leader.
3. You Should Never Apologize for Following a Dream
You don’t want to miss out on a life filled with regret. Never apologize for pursuing a dream since it is that dream that has shaped who you are now.
You can never be happy unless you live your dreams rather than thinking about them.
Related: Tips to Help You Be a Better Parent
4. You Should Never Apologize for Taking “Me” Time
You will never be successful and fulfill your happiness unless you first take care of yourself. Always take care of your own needs and take “me time” to do things that make you happy.
5. You Should Never Apologize for Your Priorities
Never allow anyone to make you feel guilty over your priorities. Always take care of your own priorities first. If it’s important to you then it is important. The people who matter will respect your choice.
6. You Should Never Apologize for Ending a Toxic Relationship
You should never apologize for letting go of someone who has harmed you. Understanding how an unhealthy relationship prevents you from attaining your full potential is a significant step forward.
Be proud of yourself and surround yourself with people who admire your bravery.
7. You Should Never Apologize for Your Imperfections
Imperfections are what make you beautiful and unique. They should be embraced. Never say you’re sorry for a quality that makes you imperfectly perfect.
8. You Should Never Apologize for Standing your Ground
Never say you are sorry for defending your values, morals, ethics, religious or spiritual beliefs. Leaders never apologize for doing what they feel is right.
9. You Should Never Apologize for Not Knowing the Answer
The constant quest for knowledge keeps our brains young. Never say you’re sorry when presented with an opportunity to learn. Being able to admit you do not know is a sign of strength and humility.
10. You Should Never Apologize for High Expectations
Never apologize for expecting the same of others as you expect of yourself. Having high expectations only means that you care enough about others to push them to be their best.
11. You Should Never Apologize for Spending Money on Yourself
Never apologize for treating yourself to something special. Buying yourself something nice improves your self-esteem. Happy and successful people know their own desires are important to a fulfilling life.
12. You Should Never Apologize for Someone Else
Everyone is responsible for their own actions and behavior. You do not need to apologize for something someone else did even if you feel their actions reflect upon you through association.
13. You Should Never Apologize for Bad Dancing
Never say you’re sorry for not knowing a dance, or dancing it badly. Just dance! The joy dancing brings is worth any embarrassment.
14. You Should Never Apologize for a Delay in Your Response
Prioritizing implies delaying responses to emails and phone calls, and successful individuals realize this.
Never apologize for not responding to someone’s email or text while attending to more pressing matters.
15. You Should Never Apologize for Telling the Truth
Strong folks tell it like it is. Never apologize for your bravery. Even if telling the truth hurts, the benefits of being honest far surpass the initial ache.
Don’t worry about what other people think of you; just be yourself. Over-apologizing or saying “I’m sorry” when it isn’t necessary lowers self-esteem in the long run. Save “I’m sorry” for when you’ve made a genuine blunder.